Sometimes I wish I don't have to learn the hard way. Which is absurd because everyone knows that the best lessons in life are the ones you learnt from your worst mistakes. Just that sometimes, in those brief moments before I sleep, where my eyes are halfway close, I would hit the rewind button. And the images would only stop at the same time frame, where I once made my worst mistake. Every single bloody time.
That's probably why people chose to forget. Forgetfulness is an asset. It erases the dark days of your past like they'd never happened. You'll be able to start again. Create new memories. Invent a story that was never there. Be someone else.
But by choosing to forget, you really haven't learned anything. Which means you are bound to repeat that same bloody mistake.
So yeah, that's why I'm still awake at two in the morning. Remembering, tasting the pain of my mistake. It reminds me that I'm human. And being human, we simply make mistakes because we attach ourselves to what the world has to offer - money, status, love, relationship etc. As of now, I'm detaching myself from these things so that they won't hurt me.
But probably the best lesson I've learnt is not to follow my heart. It once led me to you.
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