these i remember most.

friends are like flowers. they give pleasure just by being.

even though i'm not a huge fan of flowers, i guess many people do find pleasure from them. hey, i don't have to look far. here is my mum, out on her lovely garden at this exact moment, taking care of her gazillions flowers and gazing at them admiringly as if they'd turn any second into Chanel's iconic 2.55 handbag. not that she'll wear them or even know what that is, but i bet it'll look good on me. okay, back to flowers. yup, i've never really been interested in flowers. once there was this school trip to cameron, and everybody brought back bunches of flowers. i mean, bouquets of them pink, red, white and yellows. i couldn't even enjoy the view anymore because the bus was packed with flowers. heck, i couldn't even see my friend in the seat next to mine. as for me, the only thing i brought back was a hat. hey, it was a gorgeous baby blue with yellowed flower embroidery. yes the flowers were fabric but still. it counts, right? anyway, my mum went ballistic after that. all the way to cameron and a hat? that was all i heard from mum because then i was too busy watching my dad trying to muffle his laugh with a cushion. yes, those were the days.

and now, things haven't changed. my mum is still gung-ho about her flowers. more so now that she's retired and has countless blessing hours to spend with her dainty silly flowers. and me? i'm still hanging out with my friends now and then. some i've known during my school years, the rest from my university life. and you know what i found out? my friends are a pleasure to me as flowers are to my mum. they've been there throughout phases of my life, and without them, i might've turn out differently. who knows, i might become one of those emo people with studded eyebrows, dark eyeliner and black lipstick. whoa~! *shaking head to erase the image*

where do i begin? since i've never been to any kindergarten or preschool, i guess standard one would be a good place to start. here i met my best friend. back then i was this bully's dream with ponytail and timid as a mouse. my class teacher would constantly call my mum asking her of my mental situation, because apparently i was not on a speaking term with anyone. i wouldn't even answer when the teachers called my name. they actually thought i was mentally unfit. in short, i was an utterly totally ugly loser. but there was this girl, she pulled me out of that state. while all my classmates stared at me like i was some kind of a freak show (hey, i don't blame them), this girl offered me a friendship. and she wasn't just any girl. she was the it girl. the smartest, the prettiest and most popular in the entire grade. yet she wasn't even half the snob that they were. as you can already guess, we became best buds right away, and all the way to high school. those were the days when my world was a bleak, and all kids were monsters, i was blessed to have found this angel. she taught me to find the good in people, and that the world is not such a scary place, if you give people the chance to know you.

then, the teenage nightmare begins. being teenagers are the scariest and the most fun part of your life. i mean, everybody wanted to rule, and you have to be aware not to mess up with the kings and queens. but if you play your cards well, you'll get to be on their good side. me? i was the principal's daughter. they didn't hang out much with me because of that. i only have few close friends, but they were more than enough. even if the entire student body decided to suddenly adopt me, they still wouldn't match how great my friends were. with them, i learned how to let go of your fear and just live. we snucked out of class together, playing cards when the teachers were late, hopping from library to canteen to media room just to skip classes. and we found out that the safest place to hang out when you skip classes is the teacher's room. we'd be pretending to wait for some teachers whom we knew had classes at that time, and when people asked, we'd say that we were supposed to meet him/her. but most of the times, nobody would ask us anything. i mean, who would suspect you of skipping classes if you hang out in a room full of teachers where you can easily get caught? and because of that tactics, we became legend. copycats started to emerge and so we put a halt to that scam. we figured that the more you became famous, the more likely you are to get busted. so we came up with a new plan each time and sometimes we did get busted and received strokes of rattan. but we live. those were the days when i was taught how to just enjoy life to the max and we had no worries whatsoever. future was not a great concern to us. we were invincible.

when i entered university, things take a complete turn. the word responsibility slowly creeps in and we learned the hard way. paying up the house rents, electric bills, water bills, internet bills, and college fees. unlike my friends, i wasn't on any loans, so i was self-financed. money was a major problem. and studies slowly became the priorities. once i loathed studying, now i guess it wasn't so bad after all. you get to watch movies, read novels short stories and poems, and creative writing was a blast. school days were never this fun. and yes, you get to watch late night movies with your friends on a school day, at a cinema, no less. we've always preferred catching late night movies because the days were almost always packed with people. especially weekends. the long queues were just unbearable. the food hunting was remarkable! we hopped from one diner to another just to satisfy our passion for food, even when the food taste horrible. yucks! and the best part, no uniforms! on the days where you actually woke up late, jeans and shirts would do. even more, for a one hour class; ironing baju kurung and wasting the elctric bills were just not worth it. and yes: class started at 0830 am the earliest whereas at school, by 0700 am i was already at the school gate. responsibility and freedom is more balanced at this phase. we learned how to look for the fun in everything, even whilst being bored to death in class, we'd never skip them. we learned how to swallow the sugar and the lime at once. and it doesn't taste so bad after all. definitely edible.

so what does it tells you to have a friend? they accepted you into the it crowd? they covered your tracks so you won't get caught? they stayed up late with you to watch late night movies? maybe. but i guess the best of all is that they make what could be the most unbearable, bearable.

**this entry is dedicated to a beautiful girl who was born 23 years ago. happy birthday tini. live well and be blessed!