25 things you'll never know.

1. your handwriting is quite unreadable. i never really understand your love notes.
2. i actually like the way you smell, even when i told you i didn't.
3. when you asked me to marry you someday, i said i haven't thought about it yet. i lied. i already had the kids' names in my head.
4. your jokes are sick, but they match mine. so i like them. like a lot.
5. i always, always noticed when you stared at me, i just pretended not to.
6. when you got up on that stage and make your so-called love confession, with a microphone, i felt like killing you. except i couldn't because i was too busy acting angry.
7. i waited for your phone calls every night. and had to hold my breath when it really rings. and had to make this really boring voice like my heart wasn't on marathon. but it was.
8. i never asked you yet why you love me.
9. i always hold myself back from loving you all the way because i figured that if things didn't work out between us, i won't lose myself completely.
10. even if we lived to be so old that we couldn't even remember if we have had our baths yet, i want you to still remember that you love me. you don't even have to remember why, just remember that you do.
11. when you borrowed my plate without permission during camping, my pens till they ran out of ink, my eraser till it worn down, my homework because you didn't do yours, my schedule because you lost yours, i wasn't actually mad. i was happy that you chose mine above others.
12. i never told you yet i love you.
13. when i made you chased me for over a year, i wasn't playing games. i was hoping you would give up and save me from having to start my life all over again in case you left afterward.
14. that guy i told you whom i used to date, well he didn't exist.
15. that guy whom my best friend told you had a crush on me, he didn't exist either.
16. i actually love you first, way way, before you love me.
17. i like you better when you wore glasses. makes you look more of an intellectual and less a scumbag. but i love you nevertheless, with or without them.
18. once when you said you had a nice holiday, i knew you were lying. because you called practically every one to ask of my whereabouts and why the hell didn't i tell you where i was headed for the holiday that they got so sick they swore at you and blurted everything out to me.
19. i knew you love me even before you told me. i just needed to hear it from you.
20. i always feared your best friend, who was dating my best friend and still is. because he kept secretly warned me not to treat you lightly and judge you based on your reputation, because he said he knew you well enough to know how serious you are about me.
21. i always have this fear that one day you are going to discover that i am not as special as you thought i was.
22. i am someone else when i'm with you, someone more like myself.
23. every time you talked about your favourite food, i changed the subject so you won't find out that i'm the worst cook ever.
24. i want to always remember us.
25. above all, i want to move on so i won't have to write stuffs like this anymore because it's tiring.